♥
Amanda
AmyKok
AmyPhang
Anysia
Benedict
BoonKeat
Carmen
ChangMeng
ChanHon
ChiYiu
ChongSheng & ChenLynn
Crystal
DangYao
Dennis
Desmond
DeJun
E-Jia
EeVoon
ELynn
HueyIn
HueyShin
HuiQing
HuoyWenn
Jared
JiaErn
JiaLing
JiaYee
JiaYong
JinEe
JinXian
Joanna
June
Katherinne
KaYean
Kellye
KeXin
KianSeong
KitYee
Kristy
LengHue
LiLi
PeyJing
Sabrena
Shawn
SiChia
Stephanie
Stephennie
SuAnn
SuetPing
Suzanna
WanNing
XiongYan
YeeHliang
YinSuan
YoonLeen
YouXiang



Coding/Design: Yours-Tragically
Icons: Enlaced

December 2007
January 2008
February 2008
March 2008
April 2008
June 2008
July 2008
October 2008
November 2008
December 2008
February 2009
March 2009
April 2009
May 2009
June 2009
July 2009
August 2009
September 2009
October 2009
May 2010
January 2011

I don’t understand…

I really don’t…

Y mux this bottle of stars appear now?

I’m not complaining…

I jux wanna know y now?

Y couldn’t it have appeared earlier…

Jux when I had given up hope,

Given up hope on both him and this bottle of stars appearing…

Y does everything happen jux when I had given up hope?

This bottle of stars broke around 2 months ago…

As I said,

The breaking of this bottle symbolized the breaking of my heart…

The pieces of stars symbolize my heart…

It was broken into pieces more than 2 months ago…

I had jux given up hope on him…

I gave up hoping to get this bottle of stars again a few weeks ago…

On the same day that I had given up hope on him,

Elly called me to tell me she had bought the bottle of stars that I wanted…

That I had been searching for so long…

How sweet of her…

Love ya lao gong…

As she said,

We are not lesbian…

Jux really good friends…

We have known each other for three years…

Jux celebrated our anniversary last Saturday…

But what does this mean?

I don’t know…

Everyone advised me to give up…

Ok,

I have started to accept the fact that nothing is ever going to happen between us…

I am starting to give up…

And this bottle of stars reappears…

Can this be considered as lost and found?

The bottle of stars that I broke was important to me…

It symbolized my heart…

My heart had been broken and now another bottle of stars appears…

Does this mean my heart isn’t hurt anymore?

No way…

The bottle of stars broke…

My heart broke too…

This new bottle of stars can only be a replacement…

It’ll never be the same…

Never have the same meaning…

Not anymore…

The difference between these 2 bottles are 1 is blue and the other is white…

Even if I manage to find blue stars to change with the white stars…

It’s still another bottle of stars…

It’s not the same one…

A heart that has been broken can never be the same as before…

Maybe this means it’s time to move on?

No matter what,

I still wanna say thx to Elly for finding this bottle of stars for me…

Thx lao gong…

Though the meaning is completely different,

This bottle of stars will still be very important to me…

Cox it’s your present to me… =)

Labels: Friends, Giving Up, Jux a bunch of crap, Live life to the fullest

Don’t know why mum went to book tickets for Firefly for our trip back to KL…

The original time was supposed to be 7.30 …

Then they sent mum a msg saying the flight would be delayed until 7.45…

Don’t know y,

Mum saw it was 1945…

But when she read it out she said 1745…

Which was in less than an hour from now…

Make us all rush to pack our bags and stuff…

When we were done,

In the car on the way to the airport,

My cousin asked her was she sure…

Mum gave me her phone to check the msg…

I saw it was 1945…

Mum said she read out 1945 and we were the ones who told her 1945=5.45…

We corrected her…

She read out 1745 which was 5.45…

Wasted our time so we turned back and went back home…

We reached the airport around 7…

Mum received another msg saying that the flight would be delayed to 8.45…

1 hour more only so never mind…

We went to eat Kenny Roger’s for dinner…

Then went to check in at 8.15…

The guard asked me where I was heading…

I actually answered him Penang…

Swt…

I was already in Penang and I wanted to go to Penang…

I realized my mistake and said KL…

Lolx…

So yu…

Waited until 8.45…

They said delayed until 10.00…

No choice la…

Have to wait…

OMG!!!!

There was a super cute guy behind me…

Judging from his chat with 2 other girls…

I guessed he was either 17 or 18…

I didn’t wan to overhear them…

They were too loud… =)

They were talking bout how many As they got for SPM…

He got 10As,

That’s if I didn’t hear wrongly la…

Then don’t know why they chat bout pubs…

He said he uses a fake id to get in…

One of the girls asked him…

Aren’t you of age d?

Her cousin (I think) answered her…

He’s jux 17 this year…

Going to be 17…

We finally boarded the plane at 11.45…

Delayed for 4 hours ah…

I had to wait for 4 hours in the airport…

The guy sat behind me…

The 2 girls sat a few rows behind him…

The air stewardess started demonstrating how to use the lifejacket…

And told us bout safety precautions…

I was a bit scared…

But after their explanation I was even scared…

Scared of what?

Scared that the plane will crash…

That was stupid thinking right?

But life really too fragile d…

U don’t know when u might die…

I was thinking bout what would happen if I really died…

Thought for quite long…

What are the things that I would regret if I died before doing it?

There’s quite a lot actually…

That’s when I started to think you should live life to the fullest…

I finally started to calm down when we reached Subang Airport around 12.45…

After getting off the plane,

I turned around and saw him waiting for someone…

Should be waiting for the girls…

I was correct after all…

He really was waiting for them…

He’s so cute and so gentleman…

He’s almost perfect…

Lolx…

That’s impossible rite?

But he is perfect le…

I don’t really know him but he’s quite gentleman from my observations…

Who cares if he’s perfect or not?

It’s not like I will still see him after this…

Labels: Jux a bunch of crap, Live life to the fullest, New Target

Emo post rite?

Sorry, can’t do anything bout it…

Several deaths have happened around me…

My niece died…

She was only 8 months old…

She wasn’t even born…

1 more month and she would be born…

Jux dat 1 month,

But God wouldn’t let her live…

Although she was never born,

I never really got to know her,

But she had a place in my heart…

Not much,

But there still …

Hearing her death made me realize her place in my heart…

I had been waiting for this niece,

A niece I would treat as my own little sister…

Jux when we all thought she was gonna be born soon,

God took her away from us…

Everyone in my family had been waiting for this little baby to be born,

Everyone including her 2 year old brother…

Everyone is sad to know her death…

I jux can’t imagine how her parents are feeling right now?

Their pain mux be worst than mine…

Especially my cousin…

Those who had their babies for 3 months only already cried like hell when they lost their baby…

What bout her?

8 months…

She has been carrying this baby for 8 months,

8 whole months,

Everything was fine until now,

The doctor suddenly tells her that the baby’s heart has stopped beating…

She mux be suffering…

I am sure of that…

It’s impossible to lose something that close to u and not suffer…

Her husband can’t be by her side too…

However,

She has to stay cheerful…

She can’t break down…

She still has a 2 year old son to take care of…

Well…

I said several deaths happened right?

There’s another…

My tuition teacher died…

Cikgu Yushak…

He’s been teaching me Malay since form 1…

He’s one of the best teachers’ I have known…

He was a great teacher…

Had a great memory…

He was a joker…

Used to tell us jokes in class…

He even tolerated us when we were listening to mp3s…

Where can u find another teacher like that?

The week before…

He even reminded us to do our homework…

This week,

I went to tuition as usual…

We changed to another room…

I thought Cikgu Yushak was absent…

Who knows?

The person-in-charge of the tuition centre came in and told us that Cikgu Yushak had passed away…

He also told us that Cikgu Yushak had prepared work for us…

Cikgu Yushak prepared a karangan for us to write…

The title was ‘How I felt when my grandmother passed away’…

Ironical isn’t it?

It’s like he knew what would happen…

Cikgu Yushak was a great teacher…

He did his best to guide us in writing karangan…

I doubt I will ever forget this teacher…

I was gonna cry,

But I managed to hold back my tears…

Two deaths have occurred to the people around me during these holidays…

Two deaths in jux three days…

How can my post not be emo?

I’m done with being sad…

It’s useless being sad…

I still need to continue my life…

But from today onwards,

I think I will start thinking the negative way… =)

Labels: Jux a bunch of crap, Live life to the fullest, Meaningful stuff...

Didn't update for a long time so nidda wish some ppl now...
Happy birthday to Katherinne Ong Mang Ning...
Sorry i couldn't go for ur party...
This girl has the most relationships with me...
She's my dad,my boyfriend,my jie,my wawa,she's also my best friend...
I think that's all bout her...

Erm...
Next is Wong Zi Ling...
Her birthday falls on White Valentine's...
Can u believe it?
Happy Birthday gal and Happy White Valentine's too....

Happy White Valentine's to everyone...

Labels: Happy Birthday, Jux a bunch of crap

Life is too fragile,
too short for you to have second chances...
Do what you wish to do,
while you have the chance...
Cherish what you have now...
Live life to the fullest...
Life is too short for you to waste...
Don't regret only when you have lost it or you did something wrong...
Most people don't realize how important something is until they have lost it...
By that time it's already too late...
You might have lost it forever...
You might not get a second chance...
Some people are lucky enough to get a second chance...
Those who do,
won't let what they once lost slip through their fingers again...
Unless they are stupid...
Some people aren't so lucky...
They spend half their time regretting,
wishing they had a second chance...
Wishing they could start over again...

*Will I have a second chance?

Labels: Live life to the fullest, Meaningful stuff..., To you... Will u have the chance to see this?

My head’s going to burst…

I can’t stand it anymore…

Well…

Let’s start from the beginning shall we?

Today LM take picture…

I didn’t think he would go…

But he did…

They say time can fade away your feelings…

Why does it seem like I like you more with every passing day?

My jie

His friend X

Him

Me

Story

- Start -

Ling say he didn’t admit he like See Ying Bin also…

I think he like another girl d…

Not sure…

Couldn’t find out…

Goes up to X and him when they are in the library…

She doesn’t want him to hear so she pushes him away…

Eh… X… Does he like See Ying Bin?

Ask him yourself la…

You like See Ying Bin is it?

Yes…

Second time…

No…

Yes or no?

No…

Then who do you like?

Why you wanna know?

I help my friend ask…

Who’s your friend?

Do I know him/her?

Yes…

Jie describe a bit lo…

She didn’t want to say who ma…

LPS de…

Form 3 this year…

Who knew…

I only know 3 form 3 LPS only…

Bi Hui, Jia Yee and Chi Yiu…

Chi Yiu sure out d de la…

Jia Yee not interested in him also…

Sure Bi Hui de la… (I think they own self guess de this part…)

Before Jie admit is me…

Bi Hui very cute de…

Her face looks like baby…

I wanna pinch her face… (Don’t know real or not)

Then Jie admit is I wanna know de…

Then I don’t know what they talk bout la…

Monday give u an answer…

Ask Bi Hui join netball la…

Ok…

I will tell her…

- End -

You know when I find out?

At night ah…

Jie also found out he changes target every month…

Jie

Me

Tonight call me…

Got something important to tell you…

What?

He knows we know each other d?

Ya…

At first I thought is cox I was talking to Jie…

Didn’t think too much…

Before that…

Planning to go out to eat with Elly they all de…

Then saw him and Chi Yiu…

Ask Amy ajak Chi Yiu go eat too…

Then I ask Chi Yiu only they two?

Jared le?

Chi Yiu say don’t know…

Then I and Wei Ling walk in front…

Then we met Jia Yee…

Ajak Jia Yee go eat too…

Then don’t know when Jared appears…

He went to find Jared…

Then him, Jared and Chi Yiu disappear…

I decided to go pay for gathering first…

Aiya…

Cut to the main points la…

When we went to eat, he wasn’t there…

Chi Yiu and Jared eating with a bunch of guys’ next door…

Jared didn’t realize he was gone…

Didn’t see him lo…

Before 4, I and Wei ling came out to get signature so saw him…

He was with Suet Ping…

Went back library duty…

Then 4.20 leave went wakil stor find Amy…

Saw Suet Ping there…

Then waited for Amy until 4.50…

While I was waiting for dad,

Saw Jared and him…

I wanted to act dumb…

Like I didn’t know they were there…

They talked to 2 guys at the bus stop…

After that Jared say bye to me so couldn’t act dumb anymore…

Sei Jared…

Every time also ruin my plan de…

Before seeing them,

I was planning to write that essay for Pui Yee…

After they passed by I started to write that essay…

*I swear I’m not perasan… It was real…*

The 2 guys that talked to Jared were looking at me…

Now that I think of it…

They looked at me when Jared and him were talking to them…

Then Man Ning’s mum came…

She gave me a few coins to go call dad tell him don’t need to come…

Used quite a long time…

Stupid phone…

Then,

*Again I swear I not perasan*

Man Ning’s mum was waiting for me a bit after the bus stop…

That means I would have to pass by those two guys…

One of the guys said…

Tomorrow need to come for netball practice ah…

He was speaking so much more louder than he needed to…

It was so damn obvious he wanted me to hear that…

Or coincidence…

Didn’t think much…

When I was in the car…

Started thinking…

Then at night found out about Jie’s conver with him…

OMFG!!!

I was so damn freaked out…

He knew already?

Why the hell did I find out so late?

No wonder that guy at the bus stop speak so loud la…

Everything makes perfect sense now…

I had been planning to come to school tomorrow anywayx…

I had confirmed everything with Amy and an yi before I found out he knew d…

Couldn’t back out d…

Reached a few minutes after 7.30…

Told Amy bout what I found out yesterday…

He reached around 7.55…

Jux when I was walking towards QM room…

I saw him when I turned around…

It’s like fate won’t let me meet him…

A lot of times these kind of things happened….

Called Teck Seang…

His match should end around 12 so I ask him come back school…

Wanted to gek someone…

He says he only can reach bout 1…

So I changed my leaving time to 1.30…

I was so scared he would go back before 1.30…

But Amy says he and Jared will come back after eating to merayau-rayau in school…

Had a long chat with an yi…

Our original plan was to study today…

But we ended up…

In Amy’s words,

Merayau-rayau around the school…

Lolx…

Saw Rushan, Choon Yit, and Nicholas they all…

They also merayau-rayau around the school…

Amy left around 9…

Oh yeah…

Gave Jared an early birthday present…

=)

Something damn surprising happened today…

Lolx…

I actually caught a ball…

OMFG!!!

Usually, the ball will slip through my hands…

It happened after walking back from QM room…

A girl dropped the ball and I jux caught it…

Like I was so used to it…

LOLX…

I think I have ball phobia…

After Amy left,

Did something stupid…

Shouldn’t have done it…

Gave Jared a packet of sweets…

I ask him to share with them…

I thought he didn’t hear me…

He didn’t say anything…

I repeated it a few times…

Then that stupid Jared suddenly go say…

Oh! I know d! Not my birthday present also…

Then he walk over there and say…

Bi Hui belanja us…

Jared’s words were directed towards him…

Then I don’t know why…

But I turned and saw him use something to throw X…

Then I saw the packet of sweets in his hand…

I damn gek ah…

Then Jared took An Yi’s phone…

An Yi chased him for a few minutes to get her phone back…

I jux sat there and went through my contact list…

I wanted to find someone to help me…

I don’t know if I’m thinking too much…

But,

You know there are plants between the pondoks right?

He walked until he was near the plant then he suddenly turned around and went to find X…

He gave me the feeling he wanted to talk to me…

But he gave up in the end…

Am I thinking too much?

They had a few matches…

Ended bout 15 minutes before 11…

They were planning to go eat McD…

Then Rushan called An Yi…

He asks An Yi go out makan…

An Yi ask me to go too…

Then Yi told me she heard them say she ask Bi Hui come wor…

Never mind la hor…

Damn funny wei…

We jux walked out of school lo…

I ask An Yi call Rushan ask him will they mind if I go.

Rushan say no…

Then we went there…

Yi sit beside Rushan…

Then we left to go back to school…

Merayau-rayau again…

Would you have asked me to go eat with u all if I didn’t leave?

Don’t think so…

Told Yi quite a lot…

Don’t worry…

It’s all my personal stuff…

Even if she spills it out also never mind…

Sms Jared…

They still at amcorp…

Jared asked me what time I going home…

I hoped so much that they would come back before I went home…

But my dreams won’t come true…

Now I think is you won’t come back as long as I haven’t gone back…

There was still bout 20 minutes…

Rushan they all play Frisbee…

Yi and I sat at sports centre there…

5 form 1 boys were playing football…

Yi and I zat them…

They were so damn daring la…

Not scared of seniors de…

I don’t know what I should do…

I really like you…

I wanted to keep this liking a secret…

You might ask why?

1 simple reason…

You don’t like me…

Another reason is…

I don’t like the way your friends look at me…

It’s like I’m a prisoner…

Maybe I’m not…

But they give me that kind of feeling…

You are a popular guy…

Who knows how many people are your close friends?

It’s like I can’t do anything wrong…

Like I am being watched…

Do you know how scary that is?

My friends don’t look at you like this do they?

Why are they like this?

What did I do to them?

You told them I like you?

I don’t like this kind of feeling…

I cried when I said this…

Is it wrong to like someone?

Or is it jux cox the person I like is u?

Chi Yiu and Jie both said you want me to join netball…

Why?

Why can’t you ask me to join yourself?

Can I know why?

If it was you,

I might join…

You are always like this…

You look so confident with yourself 24/7…

But you are totally different when it comes to a girl you like…

That’s what made me doubt you…

You weren’t yourself…

You said you would wait…

You said you were serious…

I told you if you don’t want to wait its ok…

You said you seriously wanna wait…

I jux didn’t know the most you could wait for was 3 weeks…

Why did you make me fall for you before giving up on me?

Jux when I was about to say I like you too…

Did you ever like me?

Or was it all jux a game to you?

Why couldn’t you jux tell me you didn’t have any feelings towards me anymore?

Why did you have to let me find out myself?

I wanted to start being friends first…

My wish finally came true…

But it came true with a price…

The price was you…

When will you ever turn around?

And realize I’m still waiting for you?

The most you can wait is 3 weeks…

I have been waiting for 3 months…

3 whole months…

Going to be 4 months soon…

This might be the first time ever I like someone for so long…

Wait for so long…

Monday is the day I’m going to get an answer…

I know the answer will never be me anymore…

It was…

Or mayb it wasn’t from the start?

But I still hope so…

No matter what,

Promise me something plx…

Plx be happy with whoever you choose…

Your happiness matters the most to me…

I know Elly will be scolding me by the time she reads this…

Mayb everyone that reads this will be scolding me stupid…

But I tried to give up…

I really tried…

I can’t…

I already used up all my strength to give up on someone last year when I decided to keep my feelings towards him in my heart and give you a chance…

That was the day we argued and my whole world turned upside down…

One of my friends once said…

No matter what,

You will still have some feelings for the person you last liked…

The only way to really give up is to like someone else…

In doing so,

You are actually putting your feelings on that person onto someone else…

Mayb that’s what happened to me?

My feelings towards that someone were all put on you?

Is that even possible?

Mayb it is…

I jux know I damn bu shuang you and X de…

Last time…

Cox you all come into library every day and you two very noisy…

Every time I duty DI I also choose Fiction…

Cox less people go there…

But you two go there everyday…

I don’t like to scold people…

I hate being DI…

Plus you two looked damn scary so I didn’t dare scold you two…

But I remembered you two…

I don’t know if you two remembered me or not…

Labels: Jux a bunch of crap, To you... Will u have the chance to see this?